Unconditional Love. Is there such a thing?

You're told to love your brother, love your sister, love your parents no matter what, right? Even if your brother pulled your hair behind your parents back, or your sister tattled to your mom on you for sneaking back into the house at 6 in the morning? You've got to love them all the same. For me, it raises the question of whether our hearts are trained to love your family no matter what, or whether it is something we tell ourselves we feel, as to suppress the guilt we might feel for not loving without any reserves.

The idea that you can love someone, or that someone can love you without any doubt or limitations is a beautiful one. It's something we all want, either from our family, or our partner. It is romantic and hopeful, and selfless- something we all want to see in ourselves. We all want to believe that we are capable of loving sans conditions. Unfortunately, we are human, and we have adapted to become selfish in nature. We are not altruistic people, no matter how kind and good-hearted we might perceive ourselves to be.

I am not necessarily a cynical person, and maybe this is quite a cynical outlook. The ideal of unconditional love is both noble and wonderful, but I believe we cannot really grasp how difficult it is to love unconditionally. Sure, I love my family and my friends with all my heart, always. And I hope that they feel the same towards me. When I mess up, I am scolded, and chastised, but I am also forgiven, something for which I am always grateful. Maybe when people think of unconditional love, this is the kind of scenario they associate with it. However, I do not. I think it's love, but unconditional? What makes you look at a person and decide that no matter what they do, what they say, you will love them regardless? It has to be understood that there is a difference between love and support.

Let's take Harvey Weinstein as an example. The man who, after hundreds of sexual abuse allegations, sparked the #metoo movement, and was shunned from Hollywood. He has five children. He has three daughters. Two sons. He is the man who helped raise them, who took them to school, someone who was an integral part of their childhood, someone who helped shaped them into the people they are now and will be in the future. In no way am I trying to 'humanize' him or make him seem like less of a monster, but he is prime example of whether unconditional love exists. It seems hard to believe that his children can love him the way they did before. He was exposed as a man who abused his power as a successful film producer. Someone who paid women, such as Rose McGowan, to keep quiet the lewd actions he took against her and countless others. How can his children still see him as a loving father? In such cases like this, it is hard to separate the person you know, someone you think you are supposed to love no matter what, when they are also the same person that has committed such acts that makes you question your love for them. We feel guilty. We shouldn't.

We should be taught that we should love only those who deserve our love. This is merely opinion, and maybe my opinion is clouded by my own experiences and the experiences of those closest to me. I've seen my best friend break down from the emotional abuse she constantly receives from her parents, and in other people's cases, much much worse, and that is why I feel so passionately that love is something you shouldn't take for granted.